Again its a, thursday night 11.24 pm, just like everyday i’m laying down in my dark room drunk and high with blood red eyes looking at my ceiling just wondering about all of the things that roam around my mind all day. You hear people saying it doesn’t hurt anymore but you know what they all lie! It hurts and it always will till the very last day of your life its gonna hurt you. Everyday something or another is going to break your heart fuck up your mind and take you back to the dark and you know when does it hurt more? When you see someone else at the place that you thought for yourself, it hurts when you see someone else fulfilling the dream that you thought of, it hurts when you see someone else fitting in the picture that you thought of completing, it hurts when all those gaps between her fingers are filled by someone else, it hurts when you see someone else standing where you wanted to be. It hurts, it surely hurts and yes we can lie from ourselves run from ourselves but to a certain extent and what after that? Its gonna hurt more and it will probably kill you then. And then comes a time when you have to admit that yes it matters yes it does matter if someone leaves it does matter when someone doesn’t speak and it does matter when someone isn’t there for you anymore. But i just pray that she doesn’t feel this pain like i feel, i pray that her pillow isn’t soaked each night with her tears, and that my face doesn’t plague her nightmares. And i pray that she is happy. I may not be there in her future but she will always be in my heart and she’ll always be the one i’ll comeback to for sharing my happiness. In the last the most beautiful part of it is that you still carry that smile of yours cause baby you’re smile can make the flowers bloom 🌺.
‘Cause somethings are to be written forever’
‘’ My everyday passes in fear, and every night is soaked in tears, so baby just kill me once cause i’m too afraid of dying everyday’’